Before we get to the football preview I have a couple of house keeping items to take care of. An anonymous reader correctly points out that in my “Deconstructing the Patriots” blog I said that Gerald Green was the defensive end for the Patriots when I really meant Ty Warren. Gerald Green was the Celtic who got traded for Kevin Garnett. Somehow I got them confused. Sorry about that. I should be dragged out back and beaten to a bloody pulp.
The same anonymous reader goes on to say: “Your logic of ‘The Patriots went out and signed these players b/c they 'knew' the Chargers were 3 TDs better’ is so backwards, but it does set an appropriate tone for the rest of your backwards analysis. Perhaps they look to improve their football team on a yearly basis? Regardless of what another team in another division did last year.”
Seems like this guy missed the point of the blog. I wasn’t criticizing the Patriots for trying to improve their team; they always make a move to improve their team. My point was that they took chances on players like Randy Moss that they never would have considered in the past. In the Patriots’ heyday they KNEW they could beat teams like the Steelers and Colts and they didn’t need to trade for guys like Moss-- an injury prone malcontent who admits he doesn’t play hard every game, or to draft guys like Brandon Merriweather. Think about it, Terrell Owens was available the year after they won their second Super Bowl and the Patriots didn’t even look in his direction. Likewise do you think the Patriots would have traded for Moss if they would have won the Super Bowl last year? Probably not. But after they lucked out in the Charger game and had nothing in the second half of the Colts game they knew they weren’t head and shoulders the best team in the Conference anymore. And while the Chargers didn’t do anything because they knew they had a championship-caliber team, the Patriots knew they had to take chances on players they otherwise wouldn’t have in order to get/stay on that level. Desperate teams do desperate things. The Chargers didn’t have to take any chances this offseason and the Patriots did. That was my point.
Not really backwards if you think about it.
Now that’s out of the way…
With apologies to Peter King, these are the 10 Things I Think I Think about the 2007 NFL Season:
1. I think these are the teams that are vastly overrated: Patriots (uncertainty in the secondary, their linebackers and receivers still aren’t that good), Saints (still not a Drew Brees believer and they have a putrid defense), 49ers (injury prone RB and the loss of Norv Turner), and Broncos (second year QB in a division with strong defenses)
And these are the teams that are vastly underrated: the Jaguars (great D and strong running game), Redskins (Jason Cambell’s a potential fantasy sleeper), Buccaneers (more on this later), Jets (any friend of Tony Soprano is a friend of mine) and Rams (most talented players in tossup division).
2. I think LT is going to win consecutive MVP awards, rush for over 2,000 yards and will break the touchdown record he set last season. And Shawne “Lights Out” Merriman will win the Defensive Player of the Year Award and break the single-season sack record.
For Offensive ROY I’ll go with Minnesota’s Adrian Peterson and for Defensive ROY I’ll remain a homer and go with the Chargers’ Eric Weddle.
3. I think the Buccaneers were the most impressive team during the preseason. I’m not kidding you about this. I’ve watched good chunks of three of their preseason games and each time they did something that impressed me. It makes sense if you think about it. They seriously upgraded their quarterback position and now have Jeff Garcia quarterback who thrives in the west coast offense and who’s not going to kill them with mistakes. Cadillac Williams and Michael Pittman are a good 1-2 punch in the backfield so they’ll be able to run the rock. They have Joey Galloway and up and comer Maurice Stovall at wide out and they signed the DUI-machine Jeremy Stevens at tight end so they have some receiving options. On defense, I like Gaines Adams. They have oldies but goodies in Derrick Brooks, Rhonde Barber and Phil Buchannan and they just signed Jeremiah Trotter over the weekend. You combine all of this with the fact that Jon Gruden is on the hot seat and what do you have? A bona-fide sleeper team that no one else is picking. Mark it down!
4. I think the NFC West is a total crapshoot. You can put any team in that division in any slot and make a solid, rational, argument for why they’ll finish there. I’ll use the Rams as an example since my friend Scot is supposedly a huge Rams fan even though everyone knows that deep down inside, in places he doesn’t like to talk about at parties, the Chargers are his favorite team.
You could say:
The Rams look like they can win 10-12 games this year and take the division. They have a solid quarterback and superstars at the running back and wide receiver positions. Their defensive line has immensely improved with Adam Carricker in the mix and as long as Leonard Little thinks before he drinks. Dante Hall brings a dimension to the Rams return game that they haven’t had since Az Hakim.
Or you could say:
Orlando Pace is on his last legs. Likewise, Isaac Bruce shouldn’t be a starting receiver for a playoff team anymore. Randy McMichael is a disappointment in fantasy football and in real life football. Remember Fakhir Brown? He used to play cornerback for the Chargers. I thought I saw him behind the deli counter at Vons the other day but I was wrong; he’s the Rams starting cornerback. The Rams’ linebackers are small and it will be tough in a division with Shawn Alexander and Frank Gore. They’re a .500 team at best and a Stephen Jackson hamstring pull away from being 4-12.
See what I mean? A complete tossup. I swear, you can do this for every one of those teams in that division.
5. I think from top to bottom the AFC North is the toughest division in the NFL. The Bengals, Steelers and Ravens are all teams that could make noise in the playoffs and if the Browns ever got their quarterback situation figured out they’d be decent team. (They have solid line, good wide outs and some playmakers on defense). The Steelers probably have the most well rounded team in that division, but I went with the Bengals because they will have a healthy Carson Palmer for an entire year and their offense will be absolutely ridiculous this year.
6. I think I had the Jaguars winning the AFC Central this year until they released Byron Leftwich over the weekend. I really like their RB tandem of Maurice-Jones Drew (or as I like to call him Moe-Joe Drew) and Fred Taylor, and I think their defense is rock-solid-physical. Plus I think the Colts are going to struggle this year. They play the Patriots and Chargers back-to-back. They always struggle against the run and play teams thrive on running the rock like Denver and Carolina. Plus they always struggle against the Jaguars and they usually split against the Texans and Titans. So assuming they lose to the Patriots and Chargers, they split against Denver / Carolina, and they split against the Jags, Texans and Titans you’re looking at a 10-6 team. Now what if they have a slipup and lose to the Saints on Thursday or to a team like the Ravens? Suddenly you’re looking at a 9-7 record, you’re a borderline playoff team, and maybe, just maybe the Jags can sneak right in there and win the division.
But it’s going to be tough now with David Garrard at the helm…. wait a minute… um, you know what?
Screw it. I’m sticking with my guns and going with the Jags to win the division even with Garrard at QB.
7. I think these are how the standings will look at the end of the season:
AFC Central
Jaguars
Colts
Texans
Titans
AFC East
Patriots
Jets
Bills
Dolphins
AFC North
Bengals
Steelers
Ravens
Browns
AFC West
Chargers
Raiders
Broncos
Chiefs
NFC Central
Bears
Lions
Vikings
Packers
NFC East
Eagles
Redskins
Dallas
Giants
NFC South
Buccaneers
Panthers
Saints
Falcons
NFC West
Rams
Cardinals
49ers
Seahawks
Wild Cards: Colts, Steelers, Redskins, Cardinals
8. I think I hate reading predictions where the writer pretty much picks the same exact team that won the division last year to win the division again this year. Look at this Why-o who picked the same division winners as last year in all but one division and picked Denver and St Louis to be the only new teams in the playoffs this year. I read Don Bank’s columns all the time but he didn’t exactly go out on a limb with his picks. When will prognosticators realize that unlike baseball, that’s not how the NFL works and its reason #23 why the NFL is so gosh darn great.
And since we’re on the topic, ESPN the Magazine, Merrill Hodge, and Eric Allen are the only people / magazines I’ve read so far that picked the Chargers to win the Super Bowl. Not since Sean Salisbury’s performance in The Benchwarmers have I seen something so egregious. Except for a couple of guys who picked the Ravens and SI who picked the Chargers to lose to the Saints, everyone else picked the Patriots. What a joke.
9. I think my fantasy sleepers this year are: Kevin Curtis, Jerious Norwood, Brandon Jackson, Adrian Peterson of the Bears, Vincent Jackson, Phil Rivers, Cadillac Williams, Dante Culpepper and Jason Campbell.
And my fantasy busts are: Cedric Benson, Marquis Colston, Frank Gore, Larry Johnson, Drew Brees, Randy Moss, Vince Young, and Jay Cutler.
By the way, my fantasy team name this year is “Chillaxing” after what UFC Champion Rampage Jackson said he was gong to do after he beat Chuck Lidell in May. And in case you’re wondering I have Kevin Curtis, Jerious Norwood, Brandon Jackson and Adrian Peterson of the Bears on my team.
And in case you’re still wondering here’s what my fantasy team looks like: QB- Tony Romo, RB- Lawrence Maroney, RB- Brandon Jacobs, WR- Chad Johnson, WR- Tory Holt, TE- Chris Cooley, RB/WR- Jerious Norwood, WR/TE- Chad Curtis, D- Jaguars, K- Mike Nugent, B- Matt Leinhart, Brandon Jackson, Adrian Peterson.
God help me if I don’t win the Bada Bing! this year.
10. I think this year is going to be the Chargers’ year!
It’s going to be the Chargers and Patriots in AFC Championship Game, the Eagles and Bears in the NFC Championship Game with the Chargers beating the Eagles in Arizona and February 3rd 2008 will forever be remembered as The Day San Diego (Finally) Wins a Championship in a Major Sport.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Whoa-o, Mexico
Hola LamLoggers! Due to the Labor Day weekend I only blogged once last week. I’ll make it up to you guys this week with a blog today, a football preview blog tomorrow, and another blog on Thursday night / Friday.
God only knows how I can do this for you and still maintain a full-time job…
A lot of people have been asking me if I’ve gotten back with the Padres after breaking up with them a couple of weeks ago. Over the past two weeks the Padres have gone 10-4, are back in first place, and are averaging an astonishing (for them at least) 6 runs per game! This is like breaking up with your girlfriend because she's a fat slob, then watching her drop 25 pounds, dye her hair blonde and get breast implants. But to answer your question, no I haven’t gotten back with the Padres. They’ve done this crap every single year for the past three years! They start off OK, slump, and then squeak into the playoffs where their crappy lineup that’s filled with 6th and 7th hitters are exposed worse than Michael Vick. This happens every freaking single year. So no, I haven’t been watching the Padres and yes, I’m perfectly fine with my decision…
I was in Irvine on Thursday so I only watched a few minutes of the last Charger preseason game. By all accounts, the Chargers are ready for the season and gosh darn it, so am I. I’ve heard a little bitching here and there about the team and let me tell you something: People who complain about how the Chargers look in the preseason are the same ones who get offended from LT’s Nike commercial. Look, there are more important things to concern yourselves over than how Stephen Cooper looks in the preseason. And if I were the Bears, I’d be less concerned about LT’s Nike commercial and more concerned about the 5 interceptions that Rex Grossman is about to throw this Sunday.
It’s worth mentioning here that while in Irvine I stayed at the Embassy Suites which has something spectacular called “The Manager’s Hour” or something to that effect and it’s basically an open bar for all their guests from 5:30-7:30. So there I was Thursday night polishing off two bowls of nachos (which were also on the house), one regular sized 7 and 7 and three more double sized 7 and 7s. Man, what a treat.
(After that I went over to McCormick and Schmick’s and had an average dinner that could be described as: “An overpriced plate of blandness that wasn’t remotely gratifying.” But I guess anyone who knows anything about chain restaurants could have told me that.)
Thumbs up Embassy Suites, thumbs down McCormick and Schmick’s…
ESPN screwed up its fantasy baseball league at the beginning of the season so they gave everyone a free fantasy football team. My league’s draft was this Friday and I had the sixth pick. Here’s who I got:
Round 1: Reggie Bush
Round 2: Travis Henry
Round 3: Thomas Jones
Round 4: Antonio Gates
Round 5: Plaxico Burress
Round 6: Matt Hasslebeck
Round 7: Brandon Jacobs
Round 8: LaMont Jordan
Round 9: Joey Galloway
Round 10: Mike Bell
Round 11: Chris Chambers
Round 12: Michael Turner
Round 13: Broncos D
Round 14: Craig Davis
Round 15: LP Losman
Round 16: Jason Hanson
Sixth was a little high to pick Bush but it will be good cheering for the Regginator again and I’ve always wanted him on my fantasy team. In fact “I’ve always wanted him on my fantasy team” could be used as the reason why I drafted Antonio Gates and Plaxico Burress as well. I should just rename my team “Guys I’ve always wanted on my fantasy team.”
In the end, I really didn’t care. I just want to win the Bada Bing! this year. That’s the league that counts…
I was down in Mexico on Saturday so I didn’t watch most of the first weekend of college football. Two things that I would have like to have seen:
1. Appalachian State upsetting 5th ranked Michigan -- the first time a Division I-AA school beat a ranked opponent.
2. Notre Dame looking atrocious. I’ll just let the K’ster (an ND alum) take it from here:
“The ND game was awful. They didn’t even look good and basically gave me no hope for the rest of the season. The defense is still slow and the O-line is pathetic. Charlie should just instill a shotgun offense for the rest of the season. We are screwed. After the game I went home and sulked and wondered why every team could find the endzone except for ND.”
Well then… we’ll check back with her next week to see how she enjoyed Week 1 of the Jimmy Clausen era.
In case you’re wondering, Mexico was pretty fun. Here are some quick thoughts:
1. The first bar we were at we had two beers, two shots of tequila and a margarita and the tab came up to a whopping $27! Man, if I wanted to get overcharged for drinks I’d just go downtown.
2. The lobster in Puerto Nuevo was pretty good but I still prefer lobsters with claws… or as most call them, Maine lobsters.
3. I bought a couple of Cuban cigars, a toy bow and arrow set, and some firecrackers down there. I smoked the cigar after I ate some lobsters and lit some firecrackers on the beach in Rosarito. Good times!
4. Rosarito was like an episode of Girls Gone Wild. Girls were dressed like porn stars and there were drunken kids everywhere. I saw a girl passed out on the street and it was only around 8:00 in the evening! Am I getting old or what? Seeing drunken 19 year olds is fun when you’re 19, but somewhat disturbing when you’re 29…
Alright, that’s it. Keep an eye out for the football preview blog to be posted Wednesday night / Thursday.
God only knows how I can do this for you and still maintain a full-time job…
A lot of people have been asking me if I’ve gotten back with the Padres after breaking up with them a couple of weeks ago. Over the past two weeks the Padres have gone 10-4, are back in first place, and are averaging an astonishing (for them at least) 6 runs per game! This is like breaking up with your girlfriend because she's a fat slob, then watching her drop 25 pounds, dye her hair blonde and get breast implants. But to answer your question, no I haven’t gotten back with the Padres. They’ve done this crap every single year for the past three years! They start off OK, slump, and then squeak into the playoffs where their crappy lineup that’s filled with 6th and 7th hitters are exposed worse than Michael Vick. This happens every freaking single year. So no, I haven’t been watching the Padres and yes, I’m perfectly fine with my decision…
I was in Irvine on Thursday so I only watched a few minutes of the last Charger preseason game. By all accounts, the Chargers are ready for the season and gosh darn it, so am I. I’ve heard a little bitching here and there about the team and let me tell you something: People who complain about how the Chargers look in the preseason are the same ones who get offended from LT’s Nike commercial. Look, there are more important things to concern yourselves over than how Stephen Cooper looks in the preseason. And if I were the Bears, I’d be less concerned about LT’s Nike commercial and more concerned about the 5 interceptions that Rex Grossman is about to throw this Sunday.
It’s worth mentioning here that while in Irvine I stayed at the Embassy Suites which has something spectacular called “The Manager’s Hour” or something to that effect and it’s basically an open bar for all their guests from 5:30-7:30. So there I was Thursday night polishing off two bowls of nachos (which were also on the house), one regular sized 7 and 7 and three more double sized 7 and 7s. Man, what a treat.
(After that I went over to McCormick and Schmick’s and had an average dinner that could be described as: “An overpriced plate of blandness that wasn’t remotely gratifying.” But I guess anyone who knows anything about chain restaurants could have told me that.)
Thumbs up Embassy Suites, thumbs down McCormick and Schmick’s…
ESPN screwed up its fantasy baseball league at the beginning of the season so they gave everyone a free fantasy football team. My league’s draft was this Friday and I had the sixth pick. Here’s who I got:
Round 1: Reggie Bush
Round 2: Travis Henry
Round 3: Thomas Jones
Round 4: Antonio Gates
Round 5: Plaxico Burress
Round 6: Matt Hasslebeck
Round 7: Brandon Jacobs
Round 8: LaMont Jordan
Round 9: Joey Galloway
Round 10: Mike Bell
Round 11: Chris Chambers
Round 12: Michael Turner
Round 13: Broncos D
Round 14: Craig Davis
Round 15: LP Losman
Round 16: Jason Hanson
Sixth was a little high to pick Bush but it will be good cheering for the Regginator again and I’ve always wanted him on my fantasy team. In fact “I’ve always wanted him on my fantasy team” could be used as the reason why I drafted Antonio Gates and Plaxico Burress as well. I should just rename my team “Guys I’ve always wanted on my fantasy team.”
In the end, I really didn’t care. I just want to win the Bada Bing! this year. That’s the league that counts…
I was down in Mexico on Saturday so I didn’t watch most of the first weekend of college football. Two things that I would have like to have seen:
1. Appalachian State upsetting 5th ranked Michigan -- the first time a Division I-AA school beat a ranked opponent.
2. Notre Dame looking atrocious. I’ll just let the K’ster (an ND alum) take it from here:
“The ND game was awful. They didn’t even look good and basically gave me no hope for the rest of the season. The defense is still slow and the O-line is pathetic. Charlie should just instill a shotgun offense for the rest of the season. We are screwed. After the game I went home and sulked and wondered why every team could find the endzone except for ND.”
Well then… we’ll check back with her next week to see how she enjoyed Week 1 of the Jimmy Clausen era.
In case you’re wondering, Mexico was pretty fun. Here are some quick thoughts:
1. The first bar we were at we had two beers, two shots of tequila and a margarita and the tab came up to a whopping $27! Man, if I wanted to get overcharged for drinks I’d just go downtown.
2. The lobster in Puerto Nuevo was pretty good but I still prefer lobsters with claws… or as most call them, Maine lobsters.
3. I bought a couple of Cuban cigars, a toy bow and arrow set, and some firecrackers down there. I smoked the cigar after I ate some lobsters and lit some firecrackers on the beach in Rosarito. Good times!
4. Rosarito was like an episode of Girls Gone Wild. Girls were dressed like porn stars and there were drunken kids everywhere. I saw a girl passed out on the street and it was only around 8:00 in the evening! Am I getting old or what? Seeing drunken 19 year olds is fun when you’re 19, but somewhat disturbing when you’re 29…
Alright, that’s it. Keep an eye out for the football preview blog to be posted Wednesday night / Thursday.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Debunking the Charger Myths
The Chargers won their preseason game on Saturday, beating the Cardinals 33-31 on a last second Nate Keading field goal. I’d spent about 12 hours at the beach that day so by the time the game started I was as dead as a doorknob. I managed to watch each of the team’s first drives, a little bit before the half, and the last minute or so when the Cardinals took the lead before Billy Voleck drove the Chargers down the field to set up Keading’s field goal. Needless to say, I didn’t miss anything important. You gotta love preseason football.
As for the Chargers prognosis thus far: I think their offense is going to be “out of this world” good and I’m taking a “wait and see” approach on their defense. They haven’t really blitzed or done anything other than play their basic coverages so it’s hard to tell if they’ve improved. I’m assuming they’re saving it for the season so I guess we’ll “wait and see.”
In any matter, the NFL regular season is a little more than a week away and naturally I’ve been an information whore on anything Charger related. What gets me is that the Chargers are so strong from top to bottom that it almost seems like the media is nitpicking their team for weaknesses. There is no reason why the Chargers should be rated behind the Colts or the Patriots in the various power rankings out there.
So because I’m such a nice guy, I’ll take the time to breakdown some of the myths out there about these so called “weaknesses” the Chargers have:
Myth #1: “Norv Turner won’t hack it as a head coach of the Chargers because of his 58-81-1 record as head coach of the Raiders and Redskins.”
First of all, it’s completely unfair to compare those Raiders and Redskin teams to the team Turner has now. We’re talking Aaron Brooks and Gus Ferotte compared to Phil Rivers. LaMont Jordan and Terry Allen as opposed to LaDanian Tomlinson. Doug Gabriel and Stephen Alexander compared to Antonio Gates. In 2004 with the Raiders, Turner’s leading rushers were Zach Crockett and Amous Zereoue and his quarterback was the immortal Kerry Collins. (I went to Zereoue to try and get a comment about this but his shift manager at Wendy’s said he couldn’t take a break until guy working at the fry station showed up.)
I mean, how in God’s name did anyone expect Turner to win with a team like that?
People forget that Bill Belichick was 36-44 in five years with the Browns and a year with the Patriots before he turned it around with that team. Remember the back page of the New York Post called him “Beli-Chicken” after he resigned as Jets coach one day into the job so he could take the Patriots gig? I’m not saying Turner’s the next Belichick. I’m just saying there are some parallels. Belichick was once slapped with that “only a coordinator” label too and a lot of people didn’t think he was outspoken enough to be a head coach either. Before we evaluate him, Turner deserves a shot with a good team. The way I look at it, if he rolls off 13 or so wins this year, wins the Super Bowl and rolls off another 13 wins or so and wins another Super Bowl his record won’t look so bad and suddenly everyone will be calling him an offensive genius and the next Don Coryell.
Myth #2: “The Chargers don’t have a proven #1 wide receiver.”
This is like when a woman decides another woman isn’t hot because of something totally unrelated to hotness.
Example 1: Jennifer Hewitt isn’t hot because she has a long neck.
Example 2: Pamela Anderson isn’t hot. She looks like a bimbo.
Example 3: Jessica Simpson looks fake.
(For the record these are things that I’ve actually heard other women say)
Appropriate response to any of these absurd criticisms would be, “Yeah, but take a look at her (fill in appropriate body part).”
In this case: Yeah the Chargers don’t have a proven #1 receiver but take a look at LT and Antonio Gates.
When someone is indisputably good (or good looking) snide comments like are just plain ridiculous.
Myth #3: “The Chargers don’t have a back-up nose tackle.”
I read some guy dock the Chargers for this last week and I thought it was the most absurd thing I’ve read during the month of August. How many NFL teams even have a good nose / defensive tackle to begin with? Who’s the Patriots backup nose tackle?
Granted, the Chargers defense wouldn’t be as good without Jamal Williams but chastising them for not having a quality backup doesn’t make sense -- especially when the schmuck who wrote it probably doesn’t even know who the backups are (for the record they are Brandon McKinney and Ryon Bingham and they are not bad players.) and 2/3rds of the teams out there don’t have a decent defensive tackle to begin with.
Absurdity to the nth degree.
Myth #4: “The Chargers are going to miss Donnie Edwards.”
I heard Peter King say this over the radio and I’ve gone 10 rounds with the guy who delivers mail in my office about this. Let me tell you five things:
1. Matt Whilhelm is a younger, more physical player than Donnie Edwards.
2. Matt Whilhelm will make more plays than Donnie Edwards ever did.
3. Matt Whilhelm will become a fan favorite.
4. Matt Whilhelm’s backup, Tim Dobbins is also better than Edwards.
5. AJ Smith never, ever, ever… ever, ever, ever misses on a personnel call. Never. It just doesn’t happen.
The same people who are upset about losing Edwards are the ones that were worried when the Chargers to let go of Drew Brees, Toni Fonoti, Hanik Milligan.
Remember in Goodfellas when Henry Hill comes into the bar all worried that the cops are onto them about the Lufthansa heist and Jimmy Conway grabs him and says, “Don’t worry, everything is beautiful..” That’s me when I hear complaints about moves the Chargers make. When AJ Smith is in charge, there’s nothing to worry about. Of course everything wasn’t exactly beautiful for those guys in Goodfellas but… whatever. I’m just rambling. Let’s move on.
Myth #5: “The Chargers defense will be less aggressive under Ted Cotrell.”
From what I saw, the Chargers under Wade Phillips, were aggressive in their front seven but passive in the secondary. From what I’ve seen and read so far this Charger defense -- under Cotrell and linebackers coach Ron Rivera-- will more aggressive all around.
I think I got an erection this morning when I read in the paper that the Chargers were thinking about blitzing their corners and disguising their coverages better. Holy crap, you mean you shouldn’t just play prevent all the time? I’ve already noticed that they’ve been trying to strip the ball on tackles (like the Bears who were coached Rivera) and if this team can force a couple of turnovers a game, they’re going to be unstoppable.
So there you have it. Stop trying to nitpick the Chargers. Just admit that they are a perfect team and enjoy watching their Super Bowl run(s).
As for the Chargers prognosis thus far: I think their offense is going to be “out of this world” good and I’m taking a “wait and see” approach on their defense. They haven’t really blitzed or done anything other than play their basic coverages so it’s hard to tell if they’ve improved. I’m assuming they’re saving it for the season so I guess we’ll “wait and see.”
In any matter, the NFL regular season is a little more than a week away and naturally I’ve been an information whore on anything Charger related. What gets me is that the Chargers are so strong from top to bottom that it almost seems like the media is nitpicking their team for weaknesses. There is no reason why the Chargers should be rated behind the Colts or the Patriots in the various power rankings out there.
So because I’m such a nice guy, I’ll take the time to breakdown some of the myths out there about these so called “weaknesses” the Chargers have:
Myth #1: “Norv Turner won’t hack it as a head coach of the Chargers because of his 58-81-1 record as head coach of the Raiders and Redskins.”
First of all, it’s completely unfair to compare those Raiders and Redskin teams to the team Turner has now. We’re talking Aaron Brooks and Gus Ferotte compared to Phil Rivers. LaMont Jordan and Terry Allen as opposed to LaDanian Tomlinson. Doug Gabriel and Stephen Alexander compared to Antonio Gates. In 2004 with the Raiders, Turner’s leading rushers were Zach Crockett and Amous Zereoue and his quarterback was the immortal Kerry Collins. (I went to Zereoue to try and get a comment about this but his shift manager at Wendy’s said he couldn’t take a break until guy working at the fry station showed up.)
I mean, how in God’s name did anyone expect Turner to win with a team like that?
People forget that Bill Belichick was 36-44 in five years with the Browns and a year with the Patriots before he turned it around with that team. Remember the back page of the New York Post called him “Beli-Chicken” after he resigned as Jets coach one day into the job so he could take the Patriots gig? I’m not saying Turner’s the next Belichick. I’m just saying there are some parallels. Belichick was once slapped with that “only a coordinator” label too and a lot of people didn’t think he was outspoken enough to be a head coach either. Before we evaluate him, Turner deserves a shot with a good team. The way I look at it, if he rolls off 13 or so wins this year, wins the Super Bowl and rolls off another 13 wins or so and wins another Super Bowl his record won’t look so bad and suddenly everyone will be calling him an offensive genius and the next Don Coryell.
Myth #2: “The Chargers don’t have a proven #1 wide receiver.”
This is like when a woman decides another woman isn’t hot because of something totally unrelated to hotness.
Example 1: Jennifer Hewitt isn’t hot because she has a long neck.
Example 2: Pamela Anderson isn’t hot. She looks like a bimbo.
Example 3: Jessica Simpson looks fake.
(For the record these are things that I’ve actually heard other women say)
Appropriate response to any of these absurd criticisms would be, “Yeah, but take a look at her (fill in appropriate body part).”
In this case: Yeah the Chargers don’t have a proven #1 receiver but take a look at LT and Antonio Gates.
When someone is indisputably good (or good looking) snide comments like are just plain ridiculous.
Myth #3: “The Chargers don’t have a back-up nose tackle.”
I read some guy dock the Chargers for this last week and I thought it was the most absurd thing I’ve read during the month of August. How many NFL teams even have a good nose / defensive tackle to begin with? Who’s the Patriots backup nose tackle?
Granted, the Chargers defense wouldn’t be as good without Jamal Williams but chastising them for not having a quality backup doesn’t make sense -- especially when the schmuck who wrote it probably doesn’t even know who the backups are (for the record they are Brandon McKinney and Ryon Bingham and they are not bad players.) and 2/3rds of the teams out there don’t have a decent defensive tackle to begin with.
Absurdity to the nth degree.
Myth #4: “The Chargers are going to miss Donnie Edwards.”
I heard Peter King say this over the radio and I’ve gone 10 rounds with the guy who delivers mail in my office about this. Let me tell you five things:
1. Matt Whilhelm is a younger, more physical player than Donnie Edwards.
2. Matt Whilhelm will make more plays than Donnie Edwards ever did.
3. Matt Whilhelm will become a fan favorite.
4. Matt Whilhelm’s backup, Tim Dobbins is also better than Edwards.
5. AJ Smith never, ever, ever… ever, ever, ever misses on a personnel call. Never. It just doesn’t happen.
The same people who are upset about losing Edwards are the ones that were worried when the Chargers to let go of Drew Brees, Toni Fonoti, Hanik Milligan.
Remember in Goodfellas when Henry Hill comes into the bar all worried that the cops are onto them about the Lufthansa heist and Jimmy Conway grabs him and says, “Don’t worry, everything is beautiful..” That’s me when I hear complaints about moves the Chargers make. When AJ Smith is in charge, there’s nothing to worry about. Of course everything wasn’t exactly beautiful for those guys in Goodfellas but… whatever. I’m just rambling. Let’s move on.
Myth #5: “The Chargers defense will be less aggressive under Ted Cotrell.”
From what I saw, the Chargers under Wade Phillips, were aggressive in their front seven but passive in the secondary. From what I’ve seen and read so far this Charger defense -- under Cotrell and linebackers coach Ron Rivera-- will more aggressive all around.
I think I got an erection this morning when I read in the paper that the Chargers were thinking about blitzing their corners and disguising their coverages better. Holy crap, you mean you shouldn’t just play prevent all the time? I’ve already noticed that they’ve been trying to strip the ball on tackles (like the Bears who were coached Rivera) and if this team can force a couple of turnovers a game, they’re going to be unstoppable.
So there you have it. Stop trying to nitpick the Chargers. Just admit that they are a perfect team and enjoy watching their Super Bowl run(s).
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Breaking up with the Padres
I’m not the only one calling the Padres out on their crap. Check out what their best player, Jake Peavy had to say about the organization last weekend to the U-T (the day after Carlos Zambrano, a pitcher Peavy compares favorably to, signed a $90 million deal with the Cubs):
“I'm not optimistic about staying here as much as I'd like to remain a Padre. I hope it's not the case, but I think it's inevitable that I'll wind up somewhere else. I am not looking to break the bank. I'm not saying I want a huge payday. I'm going to ask for what's fair. And although I hope it happens here, I just don't see the Padres spending that much on a player. And if they're not thinking in that direction, they might decide to trade me before it comes to the point of free agency.
“It's not in my hands, as much as I wish it was. And when you look at (Padres CEO) Sandy (Alderson's) stance on long-term contracts, well, he's not been keen on them.”
“All I've heard from friends today are questions about Zambrano. Obviously with the Padres' track record, they're not going there, nor would I expect them to.”
“I'm more concerned about the team making a conscious effort to win a world championship. At times, I don't know if they've gone out on a limb to make it happen. I believe the big philosophy is right. But the first question I'd ask is, 'Can you give me your word that we're going to make an effort to win the World Series?'
“Honestly, they've done a phenomenal job with what they've spent. But we're being asked at a $58 million payroll to compete against the Dodgers and Giants . . . and we're doing it. But if we had made a little bit more of a financial commitment to winning, I think we could have already won a World Series.”
When you’re in the middle of a pennant race and your best player questions your desire to win a championship, I think that pretty much qualifies as a slap in the face.
For the record, I’m pretty much done with the Padres. They don’t care about winning the World Series (Alderson has admitted as much multiple times on the radio by saying their goal is to win the division) and I don’t care to invest my time and money into following a team whose goal isn’t to win a championship. Isn’t that the whole purpose of following a sports team? Fans invest hours watching their team, even more hours reading about them in the paper and trolling through the internet, listening to sports talk radio. We spend tons of time analyzing each game, each player and every transaction in hopes of the ultimate payoff: That eventually, the team that we’ve lived and died with wins a championship. I mean isn’t this the reason most of us know more about Trevor Hoffman than we do some of our own family members?
The Padres, unfortunately, feel that signing a bunch or retreads and halfheartedly competing year in and year out is enough for their fans. For some fans it may be enough, but it’s not enough for me and I’m done with the Padres.
To be honest with you I haven’t watched more than a couple minutes of a Padre game for over three weeks now and I feel perfectly fine. I check the paper to see how they did the night before but that’s it. The way I see it, I get home from work around 5:30 every night and go to bed around 11:00. That gives me about 5 hours of free time each night. I’m sure as hell not going to spend half that time watching a team full of marginal, untalented, boring players struggle each night to score two runs on five hits. Or as my sister The K’ster puts it: “It’s like bad news every day.”
So there you have it. Until they make this team exciting again, I’m done following the Padres. I’m done going to games. I’m done watching them on TV. If they somehow happen to sneak into the playoffs I may sit through a couple of games, but the days of following them day-in and day-out are over. As Peavy implied, the Padres don’t have a financial commitment to winning. They have a commitment to putting people in the stands and a commitment to making money. The Padres will do nothing but the absolute minimum as long as fans keep showing up and supporting their marginal product. Like a kid halfheartedly cleaning his room to placate his parents, the Padres will continue to acquire the Jose Cruz’s and Marcus Giles’ out there as long fans keep showing up to PetCo.
I on the other hand am done. And reading message boards and postings out there I know I’m not the only one that’s reached a tipping point with this organization. We gave them a new stadium. We made John Moores, who was already a multimillionaire, a multi-multi-multimillionaire. Couldn’t we have still signed Vinny Castilla and Doug Mirabelli playing at Qualcom?
In most relationships it’s give and take. For the Padres, it’s take and take some more. You can only be in a bad relationship and blame the other person for so long. Eventually, it’s your fault that you’re still with the person. Well, I’m at that point with the Padres. I’m not caring about a team that doesn’t care about me.
“I'm not optimistic about staying here as much as I'd like to remain a Padre. I hope it's not the case, but I think it's inevitable that I'll wind up somewhere else. I am not looking to break the bank. I'm not saying I want a huge payday. I'm going to ask for what's fair. And although I hope it happens here, I just don't see the Padres spending that much on a player. And if they're not thinking in that direction, they might decide to trade me before it comes to the point of free agency.
“It's not in my hands, as much as I wish it was. And when you look at (Padres CEO) Sandy (Alderson's) stance on long-term contracts, well, he's not been keen on them.”
“All I've heard from friends today are questions about Zambrano. Obviously with the Padres' track record, they're not going there, nor would I expect them to.”
“I'm more concerned about the team making a conscious effort to win a world championship. At times, I don't know if they've gone out on a limb to make it happen. I believe the big philosophy is right. But the first question I'd ask is, 'Can you give me your word that we're going to make an effort to win the World Series?'
“Honestly, they've done a phenomenal job with what they've spent. But we're being asked at a $58 million payroll to compete against the Dodgers and Giants . . . and we're doing it. But if we had made a little bit more of a financial commitment to winning, I think we could have already won a World Series.”
When you’re in the middle of a pennant race and your best player questions your desire to win a championship, I think that pretty much qualifies as a slap in the face.
For the record, I’m pretty much done with the Padres. They don’t care about winning the World Series (Alderson has admitted as much multiple times on the radio by saying their goal is to win the division) and I don’t care to invest my time and money into following a team whose goal isn’t to win a championship. Isn’t that the whole purpose of following a sports team? Fans invest hours watching their team, even more hours reading about them in the paper and trolling through the internet, listening to sports talk radio. We spend tons of time analyzing each game, each player and every transaction in hopes of the ultimate payoff: That eventually, the team that we’ve lived and died with wins a championship. I mean isn’t this the reason most of us know more about Trevor Hoffman than we do some of our own family members?
The Padres, unfortunately, feel that signing a bunch or retreads and halfheartedly competing year in and year out is enough for their fans. For some fans it may be enough, but it’s not enough for me and I’m done with the Padres.
To be honest with you I haven’t watched more than a couple minutes of a Padre game for over three weeks now and I feel perfectly fine. I check the paper to see how they did the night before but that’s it. The way I see it, I get home from work around 5:30 every night and go to bed around 11:00. That gives me about 5 hours of free time each night. I’m sure as hell not going to spend half that time watching a team full of marginal, untalented, boring players struggle each night to score two runs on five hits. Or as my sister The K’ster puts it: “It’s like bad news every day.”
So there you have it. Until they make this team exciting again, I’m done following the Padres. I’m done going to games. I’m done watching them on TV. If they somehow happen to sneak into the playoffs I may sit through a couple of games, but the days of following them day-in and day-out are over. As Peavy implied, the Padres don’t have a financial commitment to winning. They have a commitment to putting people in the stands and a commitment to making money. The Padres will do nothing but the absolute minimum as long as fans keep showing up and supporting their marginal product. Like a kid halfheartedly cleaning his room to placate his parents, the Padres will continue to acquire the Jose Cruz’s and Marcus Giles’ out there as long fans keep showing up to PetCo.
I on the other hand am done. And reading message boards and postings out there I know I’m not the only one that’s reached a tipping point with this organization. We gave them a new stadium. We made John Moores, who was already a multimillionaire, a multi-multi-multimillionaire. Couldn’t we have still signed Vinny Castilla and Doug Mirabelli playing at Qualcom?
In most relationships it’s give and take. For the Padres, it’s take and take some more. You can only be in a bad relationship and blame the other person for so long. Eventually, it’s your fault that you’re still with the person. Well, I’m at that point with the Padres. I’m not caring about a team that doesn’t care about me.
Monday, August 20, 2007
Deconstructing the Patriots
It took me -- and every other Charger fan I knew, about six months to get over that playoff loss to the Patriots in January. I’m not kidding. I was totally pissed off for a solid six months. As a sports fan, that was hands-down the single worst loss I’ve ever experienced. At this point, instead of rehashing the crappy details of that crappy day, I’ll just say that January 14, 2007 totally sucked.
But while the Patriots may have won that game, this offseason came to show who the better team was. Check out the list of key offseason acquisitions for each team:
New England Patriots: Randy Moss, Donte Stallworth, Adalus Thomas, Wes Welker, Kelly Washington.
San Diego Chargers: (none)
By looking at who the Patriots got you’d probably think that the Chargers kicked the hell out of the Patriots. Generally, teams who advance to the AFC Championship don’t sign an entire receiving corps. This tells me one thing: Not only did the Patriots know they should have lost that game, but they knew they should have lost that game by at least three touchdowns. And they had to react the way the did because they realized the Chargers were that much better than them.
Instead of recognizing this though, ESPN, Peter King and the rest of the national media have been busy giving the Patriots a seven month, marathon lap dance. I on the other hand don’t think the Patriots are better than the Chargers. To paraphrase Dennis Green: “If you want to crown their asses then crown their asses…” But I’m not going to and here’s why:
Quarterback
I like Tom Brady about as much as the next guy but take a look at the past four playoff games the guy has played in:
2006 AFC Championship at Indy: 21 of 34 passing, 232 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT, 79.5 QB Rating.
2006 Divisional Playoff at SD: 27 of 51, 280 yards, 2 TD, 3 INT, 57.6 QB Rating.
2006 Wild Card vs. NYJ: 22 of 34, 212 yards, 2TD, 0INT, 101.6 QB Rating
2005 Divisional Playoff at Denver: 20 of 36, 341 yards, 1 TD, 2 INT, 74.0 QB Rating.
Outside of the Jets game those are pretty crappy stats for someone who’s supposed to be the Joe Montana of this generation. Plus Brady threw an interception on the potential game-tying drive against Indy, an interception in the Charger game that would have clinched the game for the Chargers had Marlon McCree not fumbled, and threw an interception in the Denver game that Champ Bailey returned for a touchdown which proved to be the difference in the game.
I’m not saying he’s not a great QB, nor am I saying that Phil Rivers is better. I’m just saying that’s how Rex Grossman performed during the last four playoff games he was involved in. Oh, did I say Rex Grossman? I meant Tom Brady. Got a little confused there.
Running Back
Lawrence Maroney is an unproven, injury prone running back, who hurt his shoulder at the end of last season and has been seen wearing a protective covering over it during training camp. I’m not saying he won’t be good this year (especially since he’s on my fantasy football team), I’m just saying there are some questions.
On the other hand there are no questions about “The Living Legend” LaDanian Tomlinson. This discussion is over.
(How’s that for LT’s new nickname? I know, Ric Flair used to refer to himself has “The Living Legend” but since LT already stole Lawrence Taylor’s moniker, I figured he could go ahead and take Flair’s too. “The Living Legend” LaDanian Tomlinson. It’s got a great ring to it)
Wide Receiver
Only in Boston can a signing of a short, white, overachieving wide receiver generate more excitement then the signing of Randy Moss. All I can say is if Welker were black he’d be Az Hakim.
And as for Moss, in addition to being a malcontent, here’s how he did in two games against the Chargers last year:
Game 1: 4 receptions, 47 yards
Game 2: 3 receptions, 26 yards.
Granted, he did play in the Bed and Breakfast offense but really, I don’t think AJ Smith lost any sleep when the Patriots got him.
So to summarize, the Patriots signed the white Az Hakim, a malcontent who caught 7 balls for 73 yards in two games against the Chargers last year, and a wide receiver with chronic hamstring problems (Donte Stallworth).
Good job. No really, great job.
Linebackers
The thing that aggravated me the most in the Chargers’ playoff loss (and the reason I think Cam Cameron was a little overrated) was that they stopped giving the ball to LT in the second half. I mean, which one of the slow, white guys the Patriots had at linebacker was going to stop LT? Ted Bruschi? Mike Vrabel? Tom Izzo? I will question this until the day I die.
To fix that problem, the Patriots went out and signed Adalus Thomas who according to every one is one of the most versatile defensive players in the League. (I seriously thought Peter King was creaming his shorts when he wrote about this in his Monday Morning QB column). But my question is if he was so good why did the Ravens let him go? By my count, Thomas was at most the fourth best player on the Raven’s defense last year behind Ray Lewis, Ed Reed, and Terrell Suggs. This means that opposing offenses had to account for Lewis, Reed and Suggs before they even thought about Thomas. We’ll see how he does when offenses start keying on him.
Defensive Line
I was listening to some NFL show the other day and some guy said that the Patriots’ defensive line is the heart of their team. That may be the case but if you think about it, the trio of Richard Seymour, Gerald Green, and Vince Wolfork are the poor man’s version of Luis Castillo, Igor Olshanski, and Jamal Williams.
If Castillo can stay healthy he’s younger Seymour with a pass-rush and Williams and Olshanski are a little better than Wilfork and Green.
And that goes to show you, the Patriots best unit (defensive line) is not as good as the Charger’s third best unit (defensive line behind running back, offensive line, and linebackers)
Secondary
With Asante Samuel holding out, I can’t for the life of me name another cornerback on the Patriots. They’re basically signing guys off the street to play corner and the media is giving them a pass. What a crock of crap.
For their safeties they have Rodney Harrison and rookie Brandon Meriwether who’s more known for his exploits in the brawl between Miami- FIU brawl last year. (FYI Meriwether is number 19). Watch this guy and tell me if the Patriots would take a chance on this guy in their heyday.
And that pretty much sums things up. When the Patriots were winning Super Bowls, they used to never sign guys like Meriwether and Moss. They’d let other teams sign guys who’d disrupt team chemistry and wouldn’t touch guys with off field problems. Now it looks like the Patriots are doing what teams they used to beat were doing and the Chargers are doing with what the Patriots did when they were the team to beat.
I just wish someone besides me would realize this.
But while the Patriots may have won that game, this offseason came to show who the better team was. Check out the list of key offseason acquisitions for each team:
New England Patriots: Randy Moss, Donte Stallworth, Adalus Thomas, Wes Welker, Kelly Washington.
San Diego Chargers: (none)
By looking at who the Patriots got you’d probably think that the Chargers kicked the hell out of the Patriots. Generally, teams who advance to the AFC Championship don’t sign an entire receiving corps. This tells me one thing: Not only did the Patriots know they should have lost that game, but they knew they should have lost that game by at least three touchdowns. And they had to react the way the did because they realized the Chargers were that much better than them.
Instead of recognizing this though, ESPN, Peter King and the rest of the national media have been busy giving the Patriots a seven month, marathon lap dance. I on the other hand don’t think the Patriots are better than the Chargers. To paraphrase Dennis Green: “If you want to crown their asses then crown their asses…” But I’m not going to and here’s why:
Quarterback
I like Tom Brady about as much as the next guy but take a look at the past four playoff games the guy has played in:
2006 AFC Championship at Indy: 21 of 34 passing, 232 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT, 79.5 QB Rating.
2006 Divisional Playoff at SD: 27 of 51, 280 yards, 2 TD, 3 INT, 57.6 QB Rating.
2006 Wild Card vs. NYJ: 22 of 34, 212 yards, 2TD, 0INT, 101.6 QB Rating
2005 Divisional Playoff at Denver: 20 of 36, 341 yards, 1 TD, 2 INT, 74.0 QB Rating.
Outside of the Jets game those are pretty crappy stats for someone who’s supposed to be the Joe Montana of this generation. Plus Brady threw an interception on the potential game-tying drive against Indy, an interception in the Charger game that would have clinched the game for the Chargers had Marlon McCree not fumbled, and threw an interception in the Denver game that Champ Bailey returned for a touchdown which proved to be the difference in the game.
I’m not saying he’s not a great QB, nor am I saying that Phil Rivers is better. I’m just saying that’s how Rex Grossman performed during the last four playoff games he was involved in. Oh, did I say Rex Grossman? I meant Tom Brady. Got a little confused there.
Running Back
Lawrence Maroney is an unproven, injury prone running back, who hurt his shoulder at the end of last season and has been seen wearing a protective covering over it during training camp. I’m not saying he won’t be good this year (especially since he’s on my fantasy football team), I’m just saying there are some questions.
On the other hand there are no questions about “The Living Legend” LaDanian Tomlinson. This discussion is over.
(How’s that for LT’s new nickname? I know, Ric Flair used to refer to himself has “The Living Legend” but since LT already stole Lawrence Taylor’s moniker, I figured he could go ahead and take Flair’s too. “The Living Legend” LaDanian Tomlinson. It’s got a great ring to it)
Wide Receiver
Only in Boston can a signing of a short, white, overachieving wide receiver generate more excitement then the signing of Randy Moss. All I can say is if Welker were black he’d be Az Hakim.
And as for Moss, in addition to being a malcontent, here’s how he did in two games against the Chargers last year:
Game 1: 4 receptions, 47 yards
Game 2: 3 receptions, 26 yards.
Granted, he did play in the Bed and Breakfast offense but really, I don’t think AJ Smith lost any sleep when the Patriots got him.
So to summarize, the Patriots signed the white Az Hakim, a malcontent who caught 7 balls for 73 yards in two games against the Chargers last year, and a wide receiver with chronic hamstring problems (Donte Stallworth).
Good job. No really, great job.
Linebackers
The thing that aggravated me the most in the Chargers’ playoff loss (and the reason I think Cam Cameron was a little overrated) was that they stopped giving the ball to LT in the second half. I mean, which one of the slow, white guys the Patriots had at linebacker was going to stop LT? Ted Bruschi? Mike Vrabel? Tom Izzo? I will question this until the day I die.
To fix that problem, the Patriots went out and signed Adalus Thomas who according to every one is one of the most versatile defensive players in the League. (I seriously thought Peter King was creaming his shorts when he wrote about this in his Monday Morning QB column). But my question is if he was so good why did the Ravens let him go? By my count, Thomas was at most the fourth best player on the Raven’s defense last year behind Ray Lewis, Ed Reed, and Terrell Suggs. This means that opposing offenses had to account for Lewis, Reed and Suggs before they even thought about Thomas. We’ll see how he does when offenses start keying on him.
Defensive Line
I was listening to some NFL show the other day and some guy said that the Patriots’ defensive line is the heart of their team. That may be the case but if you think about it, the trio of Richard Seymour, Gerald Green, and Vince Wolfork are the poor man’s version of Luis Castillo, Igor Olshanski, and Jamal Williams.
If Castillo can stay healthy he’s younger Seymour with a pass-rush and Williams and Olshanski are a little better than Wilfork and Green.
And that goes to show you, the Patriots best unit (defensive line) is not as good as the Charger’s third best unit (defensive line behind running back, offensive line, and linebackers)
Secondary
With Asante Samuel holding out, I can’t for the life of me name another cornerback on the Patriots. They’re basically signing guys off the street to play corner and the media is giving them a pass. What a crock of crap.
For their safeties they have Rodney Harrison and rookie Brandon Meriwether who’s more known for his exploits in the brawl between Miami- FIU brawl last year. (FYI Meriwether is number 19). Watch this guy and tell me if the Patriots would take a chance on this guy in their heyday.
And that pretty much sums things up. When the Patriots were winning Super Bowls, they used to never sign guys like Meriwether and Moss. They’d let other teams sign guys who’d disrupt team chemistry and wouldn’t touch guys with off field problems. Now it looks like the Patriots are doing what teams they used to beat were doing and the Chargers are doing with what the Patriots did when they were the team to beat.
I just wish someone besides me would realize this.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Mid-Week Musings
I’ve always wondered why batters drop the bat when they charge the mound, rather than take the bat with them. Well, someone finally took the bat with them and let me tell you, it wasn’t pretty. This almost beats the time when Izzy Alcantrara, a Red Sox minor leaguer, kicked the catcher in the facemask before he charged the mound, punched the pitcher, and then challenged the rest of the team to a fight. I was living in Boston at the time and just thinking about that one makes me smile. Here, check it out on YouTube. But anyways, the lesson in this case is that Jose Offerman is a maniac.
I think the next over the top thing we’ll see is a batter helicopter a bat at the pitcher’s head after getting hit with a pitch. That would be pretty crazy. I nominate Milton Bradley the only guy insane enough that he might actually do it…
Thanks to everyone for their feedback on the new format. Here are some highlights:
From Cousin Cathy who’s in Vietnam:
“Excellent! You have been officially linked to gastronomy. Too bad you can't blog at work!”
In case you’ve been out of the loop, Gastronomy has been blowing up over the past few months, even getting recognition in one the Philadelphia websites on an article about food blogging. And since Cathy is nice enough to link the LamLogs to Gastronomy, I will link Gastronomy to the LamLogs. Here you go.
And from Cousin Michael who’s starting is freshman year at San Francisco State: “Nice fucking blog.”
Michael said that he partied with his brother last night and puked on his brother’s floor. Something tells me this is going to end with a newspaper headline reading: “SFSU Freshman Taken to Hospital to get Stomach Pumped”…
A couple of months ago I finally broke down and got an Xbox 360. I started a couple Madden franchises with the Bears and that didn’t work out (Old school LamLoggers know that I’m never the Chargers in Madden because I totally jinx them. Plus I like to be a cold weather team so I can play in the snow and whatnot). But yesterday started a franchise with the Browns, simulated the first season where they were 3-13 which gave me the fourth pick in the draft, traded for Vince Young, signed Terrell Owens, Dante Stallworth and Michael Westbrook, drafted some defensive end with a 92 speed rating and suddenly my team is stacked.
We lost our first game though. Here’s how I described it over email to El LamGal:
Me: “I played my first game with my new team. I was winning and then they came back and won on the last play of the game. I punched a hole in the wall.”
ELG: “You didn’t really punch a hole in the wall did you?”
Me: “I think I just dented it with my punch. It was the kick that actually made the hole.”
ELG: “Did you really make any kind of hole or dent in the wall?”
Me: “Yes. Now when you’re in the changing room and I’m on the couch we can see each other and it won’t seem like we’re so far apart.”
ELG: “You’re kidding me. Why would you do that?”
Me: “It was a back and forth game. I took an early 14-6 lead. The Ravens came back, getting it to 14-12 and eventually took the lead 20-14. With about two minutes left in the game I drove downfield taking the lead with about 30 seconds left in the game. Then the freaking cpu drives like 70 yards downfield and kicks the game winning field goal with like 6 seconds left. So I reacted like how any 29 year old adult male would react.”
ELG: “I dont even know what to tell you. I am very disappointed. It makes me very sad. I try really hard to keep our home nice and you punched a hole in the wall because of a Video game? I’m going to cry. I’ll see you later.”
Since she threatened me with the worst possible thing a woman can ever do to a man without actually physically touching him, I told her that I didn’t actually punch a hole in the wall.
The End.
In any matter, the new Madden comes out today or tomorrow so unfortunately I’ll have to start all over. No skin off of my back though, the Shawn Alexander Madden was kind of crappy anyways. I’d tell you why but it’s a moot point now…
I’ve decided to that this year, I’m going to throw myself into the NBA. I’ve always been a Laker fan, but now I’m giving myself a chance to become an NBA fan. The reasons are: a) I need something to do during the week during football season, and b) since I’m becoming more and more uninterested in baseball, I need a sport to follow for the first half of the year. So far I’ve been following all the offseason moves, learning about the salary cap, and reading all of Bill Simmon’s NBA columns. I even have a group of guys I’ve been emailing with regularly about the Lakers.
Today, to summarize, we talked about the general crappiness of Laker GM Mitch Kupchack and how for the past 14 months the guy:
1. Didn’t get Baron Davis when the Hornets were offering him for 55 cents on the dollar.
2. Passed on the Jason Kidd for Andrew Bynum deal.
3. Couldn’t close the deal on Garnett even though the players he could have offered were better than the players the Celtics gave up.
4. Drafted two point guards (none of which can step in and start) with his two number one draft picks.
5. Has been unable to trade for Jermaine O’Neal whom the Pacers are will willing to deal.
6. Can’t get Mike Bibby even though the Heat are about to get him for an erratic point guard who refers to himself as “White Chocolate.”
The last point is what spurred the conversation. No wonder why Kobe Bryant demanded a trade. And even a bigger point is: What the hell did I do to deserve Kevin Towers and Mitch Kupchack? If this is punishment for that time in preschool my cousin and I urinated in a bucket and dumped it on some kid then I’m sorry ok? Kevin Towers and Mitch Kupchack? Thank God for AJ Smith. He is truly the Tom Cruise to my Kate Holms. I unquestionably believe in everything he says or does.
I think the next over the top thing we’ll see is a batter helicopter a bat at the pitcher’s head after getting hit with a pitch. That would be pretty crazy. I nominate Milton Bradley the only guy insane enough that he might actually do it…
Thanks to everyone for their feedback on the new format. Here are some highlights:
From Cousin Cathy who’s in Vietnam:
“Excellent! You have been officially linked to gastronomy. Too bad you can't blog at work!”
In case you’ve been out of the loop, Gastronomy has been blowing up over the past few months, even getting recognition in one the Philadelphia websites on an article about food blogging. And since Cathy is nice enough to link the LamLogs to Gastronomy, I will link Gastronomy to the LamLogs. Here you go.
And from Cousin Michael who’s starting is freshman year at San Francisco State: “Nice fucking blog.”
Michael said that he partied with his brother last night and puked on his brother’s floor. Something tells me this is going to end with a newspaper headline reading: “SFSU Freshman Taken to Hospital to get Stomach Pumped”…
A couple of months ago I finally broke down and got an Xbox 360. I started a couple Madden franchises with the Bears and that didn’t work out (Old school LamLoggers know that I’m never the Chargers in Madden because I totally jinx them. Plus I like to be a cold weather team so I can play in the snow and whatnot). But yesterday started a franchise with the Browns, simulated the first season where they were 3-13 which gave me the fourth pick in the draft, traded for Vince Young, signed Terrell Owens, Dante Stallworth and Michael Westbrook, drafted some defensive end with a 92 speed rating and suddenly my team is stacked.
We lost our first game though. Here’s how I described it over email to El LamGal:
Me: “I played my first game with my new team. I was winning and then they came back and won on the last play of the game. I punched a hole in the wall.”
ELG: “You didn’t really punch a hole in the wall did you?”
Me: “I think I just dented it with my punch. It was the kick that actually made the hole.”
ELG: “Did you really make any kind of hole or dent in the wall?”
Me: “Yes. Now when you’re in the changing room and I’m on the couch we can see each other and it won’t seem like we’re so far apart.”
ELG: “You’re kidding me. Why would you do that?”
Me: “It was a back and forth game. I took an early 14-6 lead. The Ravens came back, getting it to 14-12 and eventually took the lead 20-14. With about two minutes left in the game I drove downfield taking the lead with about 30 seconds left in the game. Then the freaking cpu drives like 70 yards downfield and kicks the game winning field goal with like 6 seconds left. So I reacted like how any 29 year old adult male would react.”
ELG: “I dont even know what to tell you. I am very disappointed. It makes me very sad. I try really hard to keep our home nice and you punched a hole in the wall because of a Video game? I’m going to cry. I’ll see you later.”
Since she threatened me with the worst possible thing a woman can ever do to a man without actually physically touching him, I told her that I didn’t actually punch a hole in the wall.
The End.
In any matter, the new Madden comes out today or tomorrow so unfortunately I’ll have to start all over. No skin off of my back though, the Shawn Alexander Madden was kind of crappy anyways. I’d tell you why but it’s a moot point now…
I’ve decided to that this year, I’m going to throw myself into the NBA. I’ve always been a Laker fan, but now I’m giving myself a chance to become an NBA fan. The reasons are: a) I need something to do during the week during football season, and b) since I’m becoming more and more uninterested in baseball, I need a sport to follow for the first half of the year. So far I’ve been following all the offseason moves, learning about the salary cap, and reading all of Bill Simmon’s NBA columns. I even have a group of guys I’ve been emailing with regularly about the Lakers.
Today, to summarize, we talked about the general crappiness of Laker GM Mitch Kupchack and how for the past 14 months the guy:
1. Didn’t get Baron Davis when the Hornets were offering him for 55 cents on the dollar.
2. Passed on the Jason Kidd for Andrew Bynum deal.
3. Couldn’t close the deal on Garnett even though the players he could have offered were better than the players the Celtics gave up.
4. Drafted two point guards (none of which can step in and start) with his two number one draft picks.
5. Has been unable to trade for Jermaine O’Neal whom the Pacers are will willing to deal.
6. Can’t get Mike Bibby even though the Heat are about to get him for an erratic point guard who refers to himself as “White Chocolate.”
The last point is what spurred the conversation. No wonder why Kobe Bryant demanded a trade. And even a bigger point is: What the hell did I do to deserve Kevin Towers and Mitch Kupchack? If this is punishment for that time in preschool my cousin and I urinated in a bucket and dumped it on some kid then I’m sorry ok? Kevin Towers and Mitch Kupchack? Thank God for AJ Smith. He is truly the Tom Cruise to my Kate Holms. I unquestionably believe in everything he says or does.
Monday, August 13, 2007
The Kevin Towers of Blogging
“I just want to scream ‘Hellooooo!’ My God it’s been so long, never dreamed you’d re-turn…”
--Pearl Jam
With that said, the LamLogs are back! A nearly four month hiatus was exactly what I needed to get this thing going again. My blogs were becoming boring, predictable, and uncreative. In other words, I was becoming the Kevin Towers of blogging. Now, I feel like a middle aged woman after a botox injection: Rejuvenated and spunkier than ever.
Let’s talk about sports…
For the third straight year, the Padres failed to do anything to address their incompetent offense and for the third straight year they are a boring, uninspiring team and that is about to crap the bed. Look at some of the position players they’ve acquired over the past three years and tell me why you’re surprised that they can’t score any runs:
2004-2005 Off-season (after an 87-75 season where they ranked 7th in team batting average and 18th in total runs scored): Dave Roberts, Mark Sweeney.
2005 record: 82-80. .257 team batting average (25th in MLB), 684 runs scored (27th)
2005-2006 Off-season: Doug Mirabelli, Mike Piazza, Mark Bellhorn, Geoff Blum, Vinny Castilla, Adrian Gonzalez, Mike Cameron, Terrmel Sledge.
2006 record: 88-74. .263 BA (23rd), 731 runs (22nd)
2006-2007 Off-season: Marcus Giles, Kevin Kouzmanoff, Jose Cruz Jr.
2007 record to date: 63-54 (on pace for 87 wins). .244 BA (30th) 507 runs (24th)
So to summarize, the Padres: Finished 18th in total runs scored. Signed a past his prime veteran and a bench player. Ranked 27th in runs scored. Signed three past their prime veterans, four bench players, and took a flyer on a young player. Ranked 22nd in runs scored. Signed a veteran past his prime, a bench player and took a flyer on a young player. Rank 24th in runs scored.
I can’t wait until this winter season when Scott Podsednick and Mark Loretta are their big offseason acquisitions.
You know what they say: Garbage in, garbage out.
While it is unsurprising, the only thing aggravates me about the Padres is that they are effectively wasting one of the best pitching staffs they ever by not going out there and acquiring someone who can hit the ball.
And I’m absolutely tired of Towers saying he won’t trade this guy or the next guy to get a legitimate hitter. Let me be the next in line to ask: “WHY THE HELL NOT?”
Would you rather have five guys in your bullpen with a sub-3.00 ERA or would you rather trade off some of that surplus for a hitter that could help you score more than one or two runs a game?
Here are the moves I would have made at the trade deadline if I were the Padres:
1. Adrian Gonzalez, Chase Headly and Clay Hensley to Texas for Mark Texiera.The Rangers got three prospects from the Braves for Texiera but I’m thinking they’d rather have Gonzalez (a much better 1B replacement than Saltalamachia), Hensley and a pretty decent third base prospect in Headley.Everyone raves about Gonzalez but there are at least a dozen first baseman I’d rather have right now than him. As for Texiera, everyone keeps talking about his contract but he isn’t a free agent until after the 2008 season. With the pitching staff the Padres have, I’d take my shot at the next two World Series and let 2009 worry about itself.
2. Khalil Greene to Boston for Willy Mo Pena and Dustin Pedroia.I think Kevin Towers is the only person on the planet who still believes Khalil Greene is going to be a good player at PetCo Park. The Padres’ offense is so pathetic that Pena actually would look good in their lineup. I would have taken him off of the Red Sox’s hands, asked for Pedrioa and put him at SS.
3. Mike Cameron, Heath Bell, and a pitching prospect for Robinson CanoThe Yankees need relievers and Cameron would have been an upgrade in CF over Melky Cabrera now that Johnny Damon has predictably broken down. The Yankees recently traded for Wilson Betemit so they would have played him at second in place of Cano.Check out what the Padres’ lineup would have looked like had they made those moves:
Giles- RF
Pedroia- SS
Texiera- 1B
Pena- LF
Bradley- CF
Cano- 2B
Bard- C
Kouzmanoff- 3B
Heck of a lot better than a lineup that features the likes of Morgan Ensberg and Rob Mackoviack huh? The fact that Towers can’t think outside of the box (“The box” in his case would be picking bench players and relief pitchers) to get a deal done is unconscionable. If you employed a strategy to fix an ongoing problem at your job, and that strategy consistently failed, and you continued to employ the same failed strategy, it wouldn’t be long before you’d probably be packing groceries at Henry’s. I know dogs that are smarter than this. And yet somehow, miraculously, Towers still has a job.
And now in more exciting news…
The Chargers played their first preseason game last night. Their starters got flagged for a bunch of penalties, and they generally looked like crap. Quite frankly, I’m delighted. The worst thing that could have happened is for this team to roll through the preseason, develop a false sense of security, and get steamed rolled the first two weeks of the season when they play the Bears and Patriots. Lack of focus is the only thing that can keep the Chargers from the Super Bowl this year. They needed a game where on consecutive plays Craig Davis fumbles a handoff and Malcolm Floyd drops a wide-open pass. Better in August than in February.
With that said, I’ve never been more excited for football season. I think it’s a combination of another lackluster Padre season and the fact that the Chargers have a real shot at giving San Diego its first championship in a major sport. It’s going to be exciting this year and man, am I fired up!
And unlike the Padres who barely have two exciting players (Peavy and maybe Hoffman) the Chargers have legitimate star power. I can count nine Pro Bowlers off the top of my head (LT, Neal, Gates, Rivers, McNeal, Merriman, Jamal Williams, Keading and Osgood) and at least four more players who could be Pro Bowlers after this season (Dielman, Luis Castillo, Scifers, and Shawn Phillips). That means they potentially have 13 Pro Bowlers on their team which is exactly ¼ of their 52-man roster. Amazing!
AJ Smith is Michael Corleone (savvy, smart, resourceful) to Kevin Tower’s Fredo -- totally, completely and utterly incompetent.
--Pearl Jam
With that said, the LamLogs are back! A nearly four month hiatus was exactly what I needed to get this thing going again. My blogs were becoming boring, predictable, and uncreative. In other words, I was becoming the Kevin Towers of blogging. Now, I feel like a middle aged woman after a botox injection: Rejuvenated and spunkier than ever.
Let’s talk about sports…
For the third straight year, the Padres failed to do anything to address their incompetent offense and for the third straight year they are a boring, uninspiring team and that is about to crap the bed. Look at some of the position players they’ve acquired over the past three years and tell me why you’re surprised that they can’t score any runs:
2004-2005 Off-season (after an 87-75 season where they ranked 7th in team batting average and 18th in total runs scored): Dave Roberts, Mark Sweeney.
2005 record: 82-80. .257 team batting average (25th in MLB), 684 runs scored (27th)
2005-2006 Off-season: Doug Mirabelli, Mike Piazza, Mark Bellhorn, Geoff Blum, Vinny Castilla, Adrian Gonzalez, Mike Cameron, Terrmel Sledge.
2006 record: 88-74. .263 BA (23rd), 731 runs (22nd)
2006-2007 Off-season: Marcus Giles, Kevin Kouzmanoff, Jose Cruz Jr.
2007 record to date: 63-54 (on pace for 87 wins). .244 BA (30th) 507 runs (24th)
So to summarize, the Padres: Finished 18th in total runs scored. Signed a past his prime veteran and a bench player. Ranked 27th in runs scored. Signed three past their prime veterans, four bench players, and took a flyer on a young player. Ranked 22nd in runs scored. Signed a veteran past his prime, a bench player and took a flyer on a young player. Rank 24th in runs scored.
I can’t wait until this winter season when Scott Podsednick and Mark Loretta are their big offseason acquisitions.
You know what they say: Garbage in, garbage out.
While it is unsurprising, the only thing aggravates me about the Padres is that they are effectively wasting one of the best pitching staffs they ever by not going out there and acquiring someone who can hit the ball.
And I’m absolutely tired of Towers saying he won’t trade this guy or the next guy to get a legitimate hitter. Let me be the next in line to ask: “WHY THE HELL NOT?”
Would you rather have five guys in your bullpen with a sub-3.00 ERA or would you rather trade off some of that surplus for a hitter that could help you score more than one or two runs a game?
Here are the moves I would have made at the trade deadline if I were the Padres:
1. Adrian Gonzalez, Chase Headly and Clay Hensley to Texas for Mark Texiera.The Rangers got three prospects from the Braves for Texiera but I’m thinking they’d rather have Gonzalez (a much better 1B replacement than Saltalamachia), Hensley and a pretty decent third base prospect in Headley.Everyone raves about Gonzalez but there are at least a dozen first baseman I’d rather have right now than him. As for Texiera, everyone keeps talking about his contract but he isn’t a free agent until after the 2008 season. With the pitching staff the Padres have, I’d take my shot at the next two World Series and let 2009 worry about itself.
2. Khalil Greene to Boston for Willy Mo Pena and Dustin Pedroia.I think Kevin Towers is the only person on the planet who still believes Khalil Greene is going to be a good player at PetCo Park. The Padres’ offense is so pathetic that Pena actually would look good in their lineup. I would have taken him off of the Red Sox’s hands, asked for Pedrioa and put him at SS.
3. Mike Cameron, Heath Bell, and a pitching prospect for Robinson CanoThe Yankees need relievers and Cameron would have been an upgrade in CF over Melky Cabrera now that Johnny Damon has predictably broken down. The Yankees recently traded for Wilson Betemit so they would have played him at second in place of Cano.Check out what the Padres’ lineup would have looked like had they made those moves:
Giles- RF
Pedroia- SS
Texiera- 1B
Pena- LF
Bradley- CF
Cano- 2B
Bard- C
Kouzmanoff- 3B
Heck of a lot better than a lineup that features the likes of Morgan Ensberg and Rob Mackoviack huh? The fact that Towers can’t think outside of the box (“The box” in his case would be picking bench players and relief pitchers) to get a deal done is unconscionable. If you employed a strategy to fix an ongoing problem at your job, and that strategy consistently failed, and you continued to employ the same failed strategy, it wouldn’t be long before you’d probably be packing groceries at Henry’s. I know dogs that are smarter than this. And yet somehow, miraculously, Towers still has a job.
And now in more exciting news…
The Chargers played their first preseason game last night. Their starters got flagged for a bunch of penalties, and they generally looked like crap. Quite frankly, I’m delighted. The worst thing that could have happened is for this team to roll through the preseason, develop a false sense of security, and get steamed rolled the first two weeks of the season when they play the Bears and Patriots. Lack of focus is the only thing that can keep the Chargers from the Super Bowl this year. They needed a game where on consecutive plays Craig Davis fumbles a handoff and Malcolm Floyd drops a wide-open pass. Better in August than in February.
With that said, I’ve never been more excited for football season. I think it’s a combination of another lackluster Padre season and the fact that the Chargers have a real shot at giving San Diego its first championship in a major sport. It’s going to be exciting this year and man, am I fired up!
And unlike the Padres who barely have two exciting players (Peavy and maybe Hoffman) the Chargers have legitimate star power. I can count nine Pro Bowlers off the top of my head (LT, Neal, Gates, Rivers, McNeal, Merriman, Jamal Williams, Keading and Osgood) and at least four more players who could be Pro Bowlers after this season (Dielman, Luis Castillo, Scifers, and Shawn Phillips). That means they potentially have 13 Pro Bowlers on their team which is exactly ¼ of their 52-man roster. Amazing!
AJ Smith is Michael Corleone (savvy, smart, resourceful) to Kevin Tower’s Fredo -- totally, completely and utterly incompetent.
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